birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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