I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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