Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
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I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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