everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
