He is an equal opportunity slut.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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