Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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