I'm really into asian looking animals
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
