wrigley field is MILF paradise
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
