if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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