I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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