i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize