Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
