If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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