I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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