i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
