You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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