its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
this is an emotional support booty call
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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