Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
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