things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
