Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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