when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
