I'm drive I can fine osifer
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
