he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
