Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
