I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
