i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
