just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"