U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?