Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Is Oprah even human
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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