I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
