you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
