I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize