Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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