No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
