I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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