apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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