So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
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But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
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When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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