Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize