He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
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Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
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I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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