I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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