Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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