I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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