Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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