I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
