yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.