Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Randomize