You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
