NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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