the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Randomize
