The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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