I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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