Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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