wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
